Yes, its been a while. A lot has happened since my post last fall and it has taken time to integrate these new experiences AND then figure out how to write about them. I’ve been worried that I will come across as “crazy” or “out there” or “New Age Woo-Woo.” But last week I read a post from Bethany Webster’s “Womb of Light” blog entitled, The Importance of Enduring Discomfort for the Sake of Transformation. The entire post spoke to me, but these lines felt like a call to begin writing again:
The deeper we go into our own journey, the more we access our unique power to articulate something original and necessary in the world.
We can expect to be uncomfortable as we venture into new territory–places our friends or family may never have gone before.
Much of our ability to succeed and to create the world we want directly hinges upon our ability to endure the discomfort of being misunderstood and disliked as we evolve and grow on our path.
And then a day later there was this quote posted by Woman Within International:
Opening to our fear is an act of intimacy, a courageous welcoming of the disfigured and outcast into the living room of our being. Opening thus is also an act of surrender. As such, it is not a dissolution – or collapsing – or personal boundaries, as in submission, but rather an expanding of them.
In submission, we deaden ourselves, sinking into the shallows; in surrender, we enliven ourselves, dying into a deeper life. In surrender we may lose face, but we do not lose touch. Submission flattens the ego; surrender transcends it. Submission is passive, but surrender is dynamic.
—Robert Augustus Masters
And so here I am. Back at the keyboard.
There’s no way to condense the last 8 months into one post (or even two). So, for now, I’ll just mention that during my time away from teaching and writing I began to explore feminine energy in the form of the Divine/Sacred Feminine, experienced the opening of Kundalini energy, discovered concepts like Shakti Awakening and Women’s Wisdom, learned more about the connection between health and nature,and began working directly with my own energy system.
The majority of the time, I feel better than I have in years. The work I’m doing for myself has mitigated many of the MS and fibromyalgia-related symptoms I experienced in the past. I am not cured. But parts of me are healing (physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually). It’s a process. If I don’t do my “work”, the fatigue and pain returns. I don’t know if it will always be that way or if it’s about continuing to build up long-empty reserves.
Although I’ve had inklings about how to integrate these new experiences and knowledge into yoga and other classes I plan to teach, I’m just now at the point of actually creating them. And so, at this time, I continue teaching only two classes (both private). But, I will be moving back into more public teaching — just figuring out the where and when.
I look forward to sharing more of my journey with you. Til then, Namaste.